When you think you are, you aren't...

It's Friday....another "Kompas Anak" is done....Well, to any of you out there who hasn't realized, i'm the one who's in charge for the layout of those four pages in Sunday's Kompas daily newspaper.

Ahhh......G5 has finally arrived....It's the latest and most advanced generation of Macintosh! Finally, a new computer for me! A new computer that truly can match up with the speed of my work!

Hahahaha!!

Anyway, that's not what i wanted to talk about in the first place!!!

Well. Let's touch the subject of love....I'm tired of talking bout life....Love is a tiny yet a part of life too.

What?! My love life?!

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What am I supposed to write about?

Okay, let's just start with trouble of mine in love. As many of you has NOT noticed..., I think I have a problem with older women....
Yes, i'm serious...Don't think i'm kidding...!

There's this 27 years old girl...Well someone i knew from my college time....
And there's this 26 years old girl in the same building i work at.....
And there's this girl 24 years old girl (well, though only 1 year older than me, it doesn't change the fact that she's older than me, rite?) in my office too....

What?! You think that's all?! Not really, there's still some more, but i don't think they're still "in contact" with me...

Those three girls are just my present condition, hahahaha....!!

That's not all.....Here comes the worst part:
All of them already have a boyfriend!!!

My God!!! What is wrong with me and girls-already-in-a-relation??!!!!!
Don't mind me...i'm just starting to think that i really have a knack with girls like tem....T_T

The strangest think is....What is wrong with them that makes them still (how should i say this?) flirting with me?!
Aww...come on guys, oops, i meant, girls!!! I know i'm handsome, i'm cute, funny, understanding, gentle, and tender....But that doesn't justify what you are doing to me? I want a relation that lasts....!!!

And the funny thing is....i'm fine with it!!! I don't have a problem with it....I don't mind at all....It's like i don't really want any of those girls to be serious with me....
Is it because of this 5-years-girl (NOTE: 5-years-girl, NOT 5-years-old-girl) that i become like this, being so carefree?
Or am i just still can't let her go....still can't let go of my feelings for her....still waiting for her?
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God knows....
It's just that, everytime i stopped doing anything, everytime i have the time to think about it deeply (though that time is sooooo rare), i got so depressed...No, depressed is to exaggerating.....Kinda like...stunned....pushed back, fell apart......It's not in my plan for me to become a person like this....I want to feel that love again, that true love when i'd really do anything, give anything, go anywhere; for her, and her alone.....

I REALLY, REALLY want to have that feeling again!!!!

Maybe not yet......Maybe that special girl that'd make feel true love again hasn't arrived yet in this boring life of mine.....

Until the day that girl stepped into my life....I'll patiently wait....I'll never stop believing.......I'll never let go of this faith that i have.....

Ahhh......what bull shit did i just wrote???!!!!!!

Never mind me......This is the kind of emotion I'm in every weekend...Kinda miss the routinity of office work.......Gosh, have i turned into a real workaholic.....
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On second thought....me...a workaholic?! Naaaahhhhh...not possible, not even the slightest chance, not in this life time!!! BWAHAHAHAHA....

So, enjoy your weekend....!!!